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1.You're
getting old when you don't care where your spouse goes,
just as long as you don't have to go along.
2.
By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step,
he's too old to go anywhere.
3.
You know you're getting on in years when the girls
at the office start confiding in you.
4.
You know you're getting old when you stop buying
green bananas.
5.
Someone has described heaven as a family reunion
that never ends.
6.
A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to
slow down by his doctor instead of by the police.
7.
Middle age is having a choice of two temptations and
choosing the one that will get you home earlier.
8.
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow
older, it will avoid you.
9.
The aging process could be slowed down if it had to
work its way through Congress.
10.
The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it
out.
11.
Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news --
the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.
12.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember
anything.
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